Sexploits: The Basics

Wear underwear without rips in it. There are probably women out there who like the tighty whitey. I just don’t know any. Wear boxers or boxer briefs.

As to manscaping, being clean is really what is most important. If your pubic hair is particularly wild and crazy, consider trimming it. If you like mouth on testicle action, shaving down there will get you more of what you want. Do what you find comfortable in regards to hair removal in your nether regions. It's not that big a deal to most women.

When making love, like a boy scout, be prepared. You should have the following at close hand:

• Clean sheets, preferably 100% cotton and a high thread count (300 or higher) or silk or satin. Avoid flannel—it'll remind her of your grandmother.

• Condoms, in a new box if this is your first time with her. It’s way tacky to use condoms from a box that’s already open and missing some condoms. Yeah, she knows/assumes you’ve slept with other women, but she doesn’t want to have to be reminded of it as you are both lying there naked together.

• Lubrication. A full bottle--see reason above. Any number of brands are fine--particularly good are Astroglide and Slippery Stuff.

• A glass of water. Or two.

• Tissues and/or a hand towel. Do I need to be specific about why?

• Candles and a lighter, if you wish

Advanced items:

If you must have massage oil, get the kind that does not stain sheets. Most kinds commonly available do stain sheets. The brands that won’t are generally available at sex toy shops or, for the shy, on the Internet.

As to bubble bath and other bathtub accoutrements? Forget about it. It's really hard to get comfortable in a bathtub, even a large one, with another person, and she may not be at ease with you seeing her naked body exposed in that way and from those potentially unflattering angles.

Like massage oil and bubble bath, bondage tape, handcuffs, etc. are unnecessary. If you're into them and she is too, and you're comfortable with it, fine. But the reality is you don't need any of it.